For Dads

Many parents can feel left out or isolated from their baby, partner and the child’s CF team. This can be because they’re often working outside the home while their partner attends to the child’s healthcare – particularly in the first year of the baby’s life. For the primary carer, the difficulties in translating “doctor-speak” to normal language – following a day of caring for the newborn, in combination with stress and lack of sleep – can often mean that something gets lost in translation when relaying information to their partners. This can be because they’re often working outside the home while their partner attends to the child’s healthcare – particularly in the first year of the baby’s life.

For mothers, the difficulties in translating “doctor-speak” to normal language – following a day of caring for the newborn, in combination with stress and lack of sleep – can often mean that something gets lost in translation when relaying information to their partners.

It’s important to know that you’re a vital part of your child’s healthcare team

How mums and dads can stay connected

  • Listen to your partners without making judgments or comments. Often your partner just feels the need to let it all out, so be there for them – emotionally and physically.
  • Lend a helping hand and make sure you keep up to date with all your child’s needs – the daily routine, treatments needed, the medications and how to administer them. The Primary carer often attend to all of these, and sometimes taking over will lift their burden.
  • Attend as many hospital appointments as you can so you’re both in touch with your child’s health and needs.
  • Try to be ‘in the moment’ when you go home after work, leaving any work worries behind. When you walk through the door and your partner is trying to get the family dinner on the table, change out of your work clothes and take the reins – either cooking the meal or getting your child/children ready for dinner.
  • Spend some time on yourself – exercising, going to a sporting event or catching up with a friend.

Don’t ignore your emotions

Some parents can find themselves frustrated, isolated and ‘out of the loop’, and this might cause tension in your relationship. It’s important to know that you’re a vital part of your child’s healthcare team.

When some fathers talk about the need to be “the strong one” and support their family, this can often mean that they’re ignoring their own emotions are or pushing them into the background.
Mum’s too will often put their own needs aside to concentrate on the care of their child.

Recognising these trends, beyondblue, mind the bump, mental health support groups and healthcare professionals have created a range of useful resources for new parents.

Click on Getting Support if you are experiencing anxiety, depression or any other mental health issue.

Getting support